Saddest Moment:

Having the most amazing, longest, loudest, award winning burp and then realizing nobody was there to witness it. Nor did you have your camera running for documentation. 

Granted I can be proud by myself, but I really needed a bystander to give me a pat on the back along with a “That was well done, my friend. WELL DONE!” It’s not like I go around in public burping or anything, but one of the cons of living by yourself is there is nobody around to rank your burps. 

I mean.. thats what life is about anyways, right? Ranked burps. Shit. 

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Notes

  1. francesmary said: Last weekend at a festival I fell out of a hammock, did a huge and satisfying burp followed by a fart, spat in a bucket and then got up and wobbled back to my tent. I had plenty of witnesses, I don’t know who was more satisfied, them or me
  2. acegemtura said: Burps are sometimes MAGNIFICENT. We always rate ours (on length, depth, musicality etc) and appreciate the art of Burpistry. Bravo on yours even if no one heard. I bet it was a stonker!
  3. pinotandthefig said: I’m so sorry! Would have given it a 9.8765989er.
  4. lopezdispenser said: that’s how i feel about my epic masturbating sessions.
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